Gleneagles Hotel

Ok, Gleneagles is not within 30 minutes walk from my home but hey it’s end of year holiday time. ( notice how he tries to keep all and no faith on side,  Ed. )


The hotel was built by the Caledonian Railway Company and was opened in 1924.  BBC’s first ever radio outside broadcast from Scotland featuring Henry Hall’s Orchestra was transmitted at the opening in June of that year. The hotel catered for golfers and grouse shooting until the fifties. Once all the grouse were slaughtered world motor racing champion Jackie Stewart established a clay pigeon shooting centre at the hotel.

Christmas Gleneagles


Last year we were here for an Illegal Eagles concert and this time it was The Soul Brothers. The three of them put on an extremely energetic performance of mostly Motown hits but it was over a not so great backing track. They worked a lot of the naff dance moves that Tamla artists used to do and the punters loved them.

December beers:

Anchor California Lager. So called first genuine lager reborn. Any hook will do.

Tempest,  White Light 4.7% and Modern Times 4% on draught at the Southern.

American Pale by Fourpour. ” Inspired by adventure ” On the can “inspired by California” and featuring a Route 66 road marker but actually brewed in the somewhat more prosaic surroundings of Bermondsey trading estate, London!

Nooner Pilsner 5.2% from Sierra Nevada Brewing Co.  Full tasting with wheat and barley.

Brooklyn East IPA 6.9%   Not a session ale at that abv!

Beavertown APA   Gamma ray.  And 8 ball rye IPA at 6.2%  You would be forgiven for thinking that Beavertown was on the St Lawrence but it is in fact another London brewery.

Skyliner Wheat 4.8% Another from Fourpour.

At lunch in Côte Brasserie Meteor lager from a small Alsace brewery which was founded in 1640. A nice Pilsner.

Founders Brewing All Day IPA Session Ale.  Lots of breweries pushing this session idea but at 4.7% a bit high?

Flying Dog Brewery Dogtoberfest ( geddit?)  On the label and I kid you not it states: “There is sauerkraut in my lederhosen” I repeat “There is sauerkraut in my lederhosen”. Now sauerkraut may be one of the best prebiotics on the planet- but a penis replacement??         Further to which the old brain comes up with Strapadictomy which is a word I had only ever heard in jest and on researching it I find that not only does it sound like a scientific play on words it is what it says on the tin. The thought of lederhosen can get you into some strange territory!

Beavertown, yes the London one, Neck oil. Session IPA 4.3% On this can you get the heads of about 12 guys with eyes blacked out and death teeth showing. Zombies? What the fuck’s that all about? And if wtftaa is original, which I doubt, I bagsy it.

Art Deco
Gleneagles Gantry


Gleneagles hotel has recently been sold by the giant alcoholic beverages group Diageo ( name is smart arse branding consultancy composite of Latin dia, day and Greek geo, world. This, supposedly, to imply giving pleasure to whole world daily! ) Guinness is probably their most famous product.

The company are owners of “Monarch of the Glen” an oil on canvas, 1851,  that was one of the most famous “Scottish ” paintings during the late 19th and early 20th century. Now regarded more as shortbread tin, Brigadoon mirror of Scotland it is on loan to the National Museum of Scotland.

Commissioned to hang in the refreshment rooms in the House of Lords as part of three panels connected with the “chase” Sir Edwin Landseer’s stag has 12 points to its antlers which, pub quizzers, makes it a “Royal Stag” not a “Monarch Stag” for which 16 points are required. The House of Commons refused to pass payment of £150 for the commission and the painting fell into the hands of private investors. Howzat!

So now, instead of donating it to the nation, the rapacious Diageo want to squeeze every last penny out of it to give to their poor shareholders. Think they are looking for about £10,000,000

This is the world’s biggest producer of spirits and one of biggest for beer. The capitalist imperative still reigns supreme. ( notice the good but completely fortuitous link with the reigns verb to the Monarch angle. Ed )

Expect them to sell off Guinness when their profit falls as a result of my embargo.

Soul Brothers Show Gleneagles
Gin queen checks her list


I tried, but have failed to get out of this one without reference to the Brexshit thingy.

They are taking our jobs!

Gleneagles has close ratio of staff to visitors. At the show and in the main restaurant there are dozens of servers/ waiters and the vast majority are non British. Same idea at reception, in the spa and the bar. Lower management the same.  As Jo DiMaggio said when you come to a fork in the road, take it.   It’s up to you if your politics lead you left or right.


Educational Supplement:

My former primary school teacher currently antipodean sister mails me for my edification, so I thought I would pass it on. She names an English language teacher Maggie Meeks – great name- who made her pupils learn the definition of many figures of speech. However she missed this one.

PARAPROSDOKIAN: A figure of speech where the latter part of the sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected, frequently humorous.


1. Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2.  War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

That’s it from me for this year. Time to shut up the shop. I have only managed about 30 out of what I thought would be weekly blogs but hopefully it has kept Mr Al Zheimer dormant for a while.

Love to one and all.